Our Great Shared National Treasures November 29, 2017 2:15 PM Subscribe

Could we do away with the "National Treasure" honorific when quoting/linking to media pundits/journalists/personalities?

posted by stagewhisper to Etiquette/Policy at 2:15 PM (100 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

the real treasure is the threads we made along the way
posted by poffin boffin at 2:25 PM on November 29, 2017 [94 favorites]

Somewhere, Nicolas Cage sheds a single, lonely tear.
posted by Barack Spinoza at 2:30 PM on November 29, 2017 [28 favorites]

I think a simple statue of me will suffice. Granite, I'm thinking? No more than 1.5x life-sized.
posted by Chrysostom at 2:45 PM on November 29, 2017 [16 favorites]

This suggestion demonstrates that stagewhisper is a National Treasure.
posted by maxsparber at 2:51 PM on November 29, 2017 [3 favorites]

Having just control-F'd my way though the last 5 US politics MegaThreads, the phrase gets used 7-9 times per thread, almost always for Alexandra Petri from the Washington Post. Once for Ann Richards (the late Texas governor), once for Jim Wright (blogger from Alaska), once for Stephanie Coontz (professor @ Evergreen State College & author), and a couple of times referring to actual physical things or general concepts.

Way the hell back in like July or something I would swear there was a bit of a side discussion in one of the megathreads about the same thing, and after that the usage got cut way back and since then has been almost entirely been used for Alexandra Petri and maybe Charles Pierce from Esquire.

I mean, if it bugs you it bugs you, but as a regular megathread reader I think the actual use of the phrase is pretty limited at this point.
posted by soundguy99 at 3:01 PM on November 29, 2017 [20 favorites]

Our real national treasure is the pumpkin spiced latte.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 3:17 PM on November 29, 2017 [9 favorites]

Can we still call Willie Nelson a "Goddamned National Treasure"? Because if we can't, I may have to leave.
posted by Elly Vortex at 3:24 PM on November 29, 2017 [30 favorites]

National Treasures must be localized for all Metafilter readers so the real issue is finding someone to do the i18n work on your comment.
posted by GuyZero at 3:42 PM on November 29, 2017 [15 favorites]

National Treasures are a portfolio of nationally significant historic places where the National Trust is taking direct action.
At the top of this list, under an "ACT NOW" status, is Cape Flattery Lighthouse, and all I could think was "Flattery will get you nowhere." But maybe we could have a link to a physical place on the list every time we use that designation, because with the plans the current Administration has for them, these Treasures need all the help they can get.
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:45 PM on November 29, 2017 [4 favorites]

President Trump is a National Treasure.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 3:51 PM on November 29, 2017 [1 favorite]

Dammed autocorrect. I meant Treason. President Trump is a National Treason.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 3:52 PM on November 29, 2017 [37 favorites]

My autocorrect brought up "treadmill", "treehouse", "treatment", "travesty", "tragedy" and "treaty of westphalia"
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:03 PM on November 29, 2017 [21 favorites]

I know this is small stuff in the grand scheme of the world, but continuously doing this for a subset of media personalities just invites derails and arguments, assumes in-group shared admiration, and anoints a special kind of authority or truth to everything that flows from that person's platform.

I can get behind all of this, but it's kinda like asking Twitter users to stop using "When you ... wish your neighbors would stop doing that thing" to caption a photo of a dog side eying a dancing cat as a humorous shorthand for a feeling of frustration or bemusement (forex; you know what I mean. please stop it, twitter users). The horse is out of the barn and the crowd enjoys the rodeo.

If it's any consolation, we'll eventually tire of the National Treasure appellation and move on to something else equally as irksome.
posted by notyou at 4:10 PM on November 29, 2017 [6 favorites]

This whole topic reminds me of the Tracy Ullman show recurring sketch with Dame Judi Dench trashing everything and mostly getting away with it because she is "National Treasure Dame Judy Dench," so nobody believes she'd actually act up.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 4:19 PM on November 29, 2017 [4 favorites]

I am totally enamored of Ms. Petri, which is why I created a keyboard shortcut for "National Treasure Alexandra Petri, WaPo:" and also for "Stopped Clock Jennifer Rubin, WaPo:" but there is no enamoration there however I will stop using it if it really bugs people.

~sniffle
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 4:34 PM on November 29, 2017 [13 favorites]

Could we use National Velvet instead?
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:43 PM on November 29, 2017 [3 favorites]

President Trump is a National Treasure.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins

Thanks for the clarification, I definitely had some questions.
posted by ActingTheGoat at 4:46 PM on November 29, 2017 [2 favorites]

I am so in the weeds with autocorrect.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 5:04 PM on November 29, 2017 [12 favorites]

Two of the 624 examples found by Google concern Shaun Micallef and Lee Lin Chin, and they will both see Alexandra Petri near the bike racks after school and she will be sorry
posted by obiwanwasabi at 5:29 PM on November 29, 2017 [7 favorites]

oneswellfoop: "My autocorrect brought up "treadmill", "treehouse", "treatment", "travesty", "tragedy" and "treaty of westphalia""

Right, good point, the text of the Peace of Westphalia should be engraved on the plinth for the statue.

You may have to use pretty small type.
posted by Chrysostom at 5:46 PM on November 29, 2017 [1 favorite]

At some point last summer I compiled a list of people who have been referred to as a "national treasure" on MetaFilter. I meant to make a MetaTalk post about it and never got around to it, but this seems like the natural place, so here goes. An asterisk indicates that the person was denoted a "goddamn" or "fucking" national treasure.

Tom Magliozzi
KC Green*
Farley Mowat (Canada)
Stephen Root*
Howard Armstrong
Bobby Charles
Samantha Bee
Charles Pierce
Jon Bois
Roger Ebert*
Steve Wozniak
Tom Scharpling
Mark Steel
Sir Patrick Moore (UK)
James Lileks
Joni Mitchell (Canada)
Rachel Edidin
Vin Scully
Ian Hislop (UK)
Darlene Love
George Takei
Lee Lin Chin (Australia)
Buddy Emmons
Neil Cicierega
Reggie Watts (country of WTFSoAwesomeistan)
Tom Skilling
Mike Yard
Rene Russo*
Jon Stewart
Joe Jervis
Dave Barry
Rodney Dangerfield
Paget Brewster
Carol Off
Caitlin Moran*
posted by escabeche at 6:09 PM on November 29, 2017 [28 favorites]

we could be a bit more piratical and call them national booty but I guess that might be little problematic
posted by Sebmojo at 6:23 PM on November 29, 2017 [2 favorites]

Seriously, Lileks? Was this pre 9/11, before he went all Islamophobe?
posted by Chrysostom at 6:25 PM on November 29, 2017 [8 favorites]

Great guess! June 19, 2001 .
posted by ActingTheGoat at 6:29 PM on November 29, 2017 [13 favorites]

^Way the hell back in like July or something I would swear there was a bit of a side discussion in one of the megathreads about the same thing, and after that the usage got cut way back and since then has been almost entirely been used for Alexandra Petri and maybe Charles Pierce from Esquire.

I mean, if it bugs you it bugs you, but as a regular megathread reader I think the actual use of the phrase is pretty limited at this point.

That may very well be so. I stepped away from the mega threads for a long time for many reasons and popped back in to see if the new rules on mega threads had improved the tenor, only to witness a derail brought on by the honorific. (Since deleted). And had a brief flashback to the many times when it was used to preface quotes when I first tried following those threads and how it grated when used in relation to people who (imo) supplied a never-ending supply of bad takes/had poor track records. If it's now rare and used sparingly then it must have just been coincidental timing.
posted by stagewhisper at 7:29 PM on November 29, 2017

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE
posted by octobersurprise at 7:41 PM on November 29, 2017 [7 favorites]

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE
?
If this was directed at my follow-up comment, I don't get it? I wasn't being sarcastic, I was honestly saying that if it'd already been hashed out in a thread and stopped being a problem that's great so nevermind?
posted by stagewhisper at 7:54 PM on November 29, 2017 [1 favorite]

I called Nardwuar The Human Serviette a national treasure and I stand by it.
posted by rodlymight at 7:57 PM on November 29, 2017 [6 favorites]

In recent US political threads, "national treasure" seems to get used mostly in the phrase "national treasure Alexandra Petri", a political satirist who writes for the Washington Post. I have absolutely no objection to this because I also think she's really funny. I hope the people who've been using this phrase keep using it.

Just in the past hour, I saw somebody use the phrase to refer to Ursula Vernon, a science fiction writer I'd never heard of. This isn't a scientific survey or anything, but I think "national treasure" is a term people use for people whose work they think has particular literary or artistic merit, not pundits so much.
posted by nangar at 8:45 PM on November 29, 2017

From that list, I am down with Vin Scully, wondering hard about Rene Russo and even more amazed that Red Skelton, Bob Hope, Lucille Ball, Soupy Sales and the like did not make the list.
posted by AugustWest at 9:07 PM on November 29, 2017

How on earth has Mallory Ortberg not been called a National Treasure on Metafilter before??? Because she is. She is a goddamned national treasure. And now she's been called one here!

Did you know there's a Dear Prudence podcast every week? Yeah, she answers people's questions and gives really good advice, but it's mostly a format for Mallory Ortberg to Mallory Ortberg once a week, usually with a really interesting co-host, and it is delightful. It's really great for when 2017 is just crushing your soul, which is how I wound up listening to a year's worth of archives this summer.
posted by lunasol at 9:28 PM on November 29, 2017 [23 favorites]

My autocorrect brought up ... "treehouse"

I would visit a National Treehouse.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:37 PM on November 29, 2017 [10 favorites]

Samantha Bee is also Canadian
posted by philip-random at 11:04 PM on November 29, 2017 [3 favorites]

I am in, as long as we have an exception for National Treasure Chuck Tingle.
posted by Literaryhero at 1:47 AM on November 30, 2017 [14 favorites]

The massive list earlier seems to imply that Caitlin Moran is American? She's British. You lot can have her if you want, though. She's no national treasure, she's a fucking TERF.
posted by Dysk at 4:49 AM on November 30, 2017 [7 favorites]

+1. Cutesy and annoying shibboleth. To the glue factory.
posted by thelonius at 5:17 AM on November 30, 2017

Could we use National Velvet instead?

National Velvet *Cake*
posted by jointhedance at 5:57 AM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

How about you can use national treasure but in reference to the nation of Quebec and you have to post the comment in Quebecois?
posted by TheLateGreatAbrahamLincoln at 6:28 AM on November 30, 2017

Patrick Moore, UKIPper and author of How To Annoy Bureaucrats? Surely we can do better than that.
posted by paduasoy at 6:53 AM on November 30, 2017 [1 favorite]

National Treasure bondcliff doesn't agree.
posted by bondcliff at 7:09 AM on November 30, 2017 [2 favorites]

How on earth has Mallory Ortberg not been called a National Treasure on Metafilter before???

Yeah, I was totally going to say we need an exemption for National Treasure Jon Bois and National Treasure Mallory Ortberg.

OMG I can't wait to check out her podcast.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:18 AM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

I could have sworn I'd called both Mallory Ortberg and Kristin Chirico national treasures here before, and it looks like I didn't, but I've thought it, and I still think it.

The only time I've ever described anyone as a "treasure" here was for Boggle the Owl. I guess he's not a national treasure, more of a local or state treasure.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:00 AM on November 30, 2017 [2 favorites]

At some point last summer I compiled a list of people who have been referred to as a "national treasure" on MetaFilter.

Bless you, escabeche.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:05 AM on November 30, 2017 [4 favorites]

You know who else was a National Treasure? That's right: Matt Berninger.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 8:15 AM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

Milkshake Duck is a national treasure!
posted by grouse at 8:31 AM on November 30, 2017 [10 favorites]

Milkshake Duck is a national disgrace!
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 8:32 AM on November 30, 2017 [14 favorites]

From that list, I am down with Vin Scully

You may choose from either of the following headlines to soften the blow:

1. We Regret to Inform you that National Treasure is Racist
2. Your Favorite National Treasure Sucks

Either way, sorry:

I have only one personal thought, really. And I am so disappointed. And I used to love, during the fall and winter, to watch the NFL on Sunday. And it’s not that I’m some great patriot. I was in the Navy for a year—didn’t go anywhere, didn’t do anything. But I have overwhelming respect and admiration for anyone who puts on a uniform and goes to war. So the only thing I can do in my little way is not to preach. I will never watch another NFL game.

posted by SpiffyRob at 8:32 AM on November 30, 2017 [1 favorite]

Whoa, quasi-jinx.
posted by SpiffyRob at 8:32 AM on November 30, 2017

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE
?
If this was directed at my follow-up comment, I don't get it?

Because complaining about an already deleted comment is a waste of time and bandwidth, that follow-up didn't really help your argument.

On the other hand, I laughed when Johnny Wallflower said that he has a keyboard shortcut for NTAP, WP so thanks for the post, I guess.
posted by ActingTheGoat at 8:56 AM on November 30, 2017

I feel National Treasure is a phrase far too quotidian for Mallory Ortberg who should be called instead Extremely Human Large Spider Mallory Ortberg, or something similarly unreproducible.
posted by Squeak Attack at 9:05 AM on November 30, 2017 [6 favorites]

My national treasure isn't your national treasure, now what?
posted by infini at 9:10 AM on November 30, 2017

Millennial Horcrux Mallory Ortberg
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:16 AM on November 30, 2017 [31 favorites]

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Ortberg R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 9:24 AM on November 30, 2017 [7 favorites]

May it please the MetaCourt: a "national" treasure is presumably any treasure the ownership of which vests in the Crown, in accordance with Section 4(1) of the Treasure Act 1996.

I note that "treasure", for the purposes of Section 1(1) of that Act of Parliament, is defined to include various objects of ancient provenance and sufficient precious-metallic content, and also any object at least 200 years old when found, which belongs to a class designated under section 2(1).

By such section 2(1) of aforementioned Act, the Secretary of State may by order designate any class of object which he considers to be of outstanding historical, archaeological or cultural importance as "treasure".

My submission is, therefore, that any personage presented in this forum as a "national treasure" must, in accordance with the relevant Act, be over 200 years old and the subject of an Order of the Secretary of State (assuming the personage in question has no significant precious-metallic content).

I assume, of course, that we are discussing the proper application of the nomenclature in question as provided by the laws of the nation of the United Kingdom (although I make no submissions on Scots law in this matter). If there is another "nation" that is relevant to the determination of this question - the Isle of Man, perhaps, or one or more of the Bailiwicks of the Channel? - I should be pleased to call for appropriate counsel therefrom to further assist you.

And until I can assist you further, those are my submissions on this matter.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 9:27 AM on November 30, 2017 [10 favorites]

Seriously, Lileks?

Metafilter's own lileks. Hay guyz, remember when Tennessee State ~~Treasure~~ employee Glenn Harlan Reynolds used to run headlines like A GUY ATTACKS JAMES LILEKS ON METAFILTER? Good times, good times, hehindeedy.

Well, we'll always have the Gallery of Regrettable Foods.
posted by octobersurprise at 9:31 AM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

Milkshake Duck is a national treasure!
posted by grouse at 11:31 AM on November 30

Milkshake Duck is a national disgrace!
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 11:32 AM on November 30

well that was fast
posted by numaner at 9:41 AM on November 30, 2017 [5 favorites]

JOHNNY CASH IS A NATIONAL TREASURE.
posted by clavdivs at 10:26 AM on November 30, 2017

National Treasure is particularly apt for Alexandra Petri because she writes for the Washington Post about Washington stuff and Washington is where we keep our national treasures. If referring to her as such becomes prohibited, I will sneakily lay clues in every thread to the suppressed truth that Alexandra Petri is, in fact, a national treasure, always staying one step ahead of the mods who, blinded by their sense of duty, might attempt to stop me. When an enterprising national treasure hunter who thinks outside the box and doesn't play by the rules discovers that Alexandra Petri really was the national treasure all along, the mods will cross their arms and shake their heads and say "well, son of a bitch, he was right all along" or something like that as Alexandra Petri is rightfully restored to her place in the Smithsonian
posted by prize bull octorok at 10:43 AM on November 30, 2017 [20 favorites]

Maybe what rankles with "National Treasure" is that it sounds like saying "We all adore this person" rather than "I adore this person." Asserting unanimity can irk the iconoclast. (Do those last three words work as a band name?)
posted by puddledork at 11:59 AM on November 30, 2017 [6 favorites]

My national treasure annexed your national treasure.
posted by ardgedee at 12:01 PM on November 30, 2017 [1 favorite]

That's my pub, the Irked Iconoclast.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 12:02 PM on November 30, 2017 [10 favorites]

The original iconoclasts were defeated, fwiw.
posted by Chrysostom at 12:06 PM on November 30, 2017

That's my pub, the Irked Iconoclast.

I love their sign.
posted by Floydd at 12:07 PM on November 30, 2017

Asserting unanimity can irk the iconoclast.

Fine. I have updated my keyboard shortcut.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 12:38 PM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

NT Mallory Ortberg's made a new home on the internets. (The Shatner Chatner used to be via Tinyletter, but it exceeded the subscriber limit.)
posted by Iris Gambol at 1:19 PM on November 30, 2017 [2 favorites]

The original iconoclasts were defeated, fwiw.

Defeated, publicly vilified, and given extremely mean nicknames.
posted by Copronymus at 1:27 PM on November 30, 2017

Crappy names, even.
posted by zombieflanders at 3:14 PM on November 30, 2017 [1 favorite]

Somewhere, Nicolas Cage sheds a single, lonely tear.
So does Robbie Coltrane.
posted by unliteral at 4:21 PM on November 30, 2017

Farley Mowat (Canada)
Sir Patrick Moore (UK)
Joni Mitchell (Canada)
Ian Hislop (UK)
Lee Lin Chin (Australia)
Samantha Bee is also Canadian
The massive list earlier seems to imply that Caitlin Moran is American? She's British.

There seem to be other nations with treasures.
posted by sammyo at 8:05 PM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

An asterisk indicates that the person was denoted a "goddamn" or "fucking" national treasure.

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier? It's way more overused on Metafilter than anywhere else.
posted by John Cohen at 8:54 PM on November 30, 2017 [3 favorites]

goddamn right.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:03 PM on November 30, 2017 [2 favorites]

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier? It's way more overused on Metafilter than anywhere else.

Well if you say so then it must be true.
posted by ActingTheGoat at 9:49 PM on November 30, 2017 [1 favorite]

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier?

Indeed. The proper modifier is "goddamned". "Goddamn" is a curse.
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 10:27 PM on November 30, 2017 [4 favorites]

Who will speak for the humble goddam?
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:53 PM on November 30, 2017 [6 favorites]

I don't give a good gorram.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 10:57 PM on November 30, 2017 [5 favorites]

MORBO IS A GALACTIC TREASURE
posted by klangklangston at 12:06 AM on December 1, 2017 [9 favorites]

I’m not getting the outrage, sorry.

Most of the time people deploy “national treasure” it seems there is a reasonable argument that the person identified does represent a uniquely valuable voice or contributor to the nation’s cultural identity.

eschabeche’s list seems relatively non- controversial. Where are the people referring to “national treasure” Ted Nugent, or the
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 12:34 AM on December 1, 2017 [4 favorites]

If we're not 100% on someone they can just be a notional treasure.
posted by lucidium at 2:26 AM on December 1, 2017 [11 favorites]

There seem to be other nations with treasures.

Yes, the non-Americans were marked as such. Moran was not, indicating by omission that she is American.
posted by Dysk at 3:02 AM on December 1, 2017

Another pet peeve: Many people are *terrible* at the Ron Howard Narrator bit. I'm actually wondering if it's gotten so pervasive that folks are taking a stab at it without having any familiarity with Arrested Development at all.
posted by SpiffyRob at 5:51 AM on December 1, 2017 [3 favorites]

NARRATOR: It is, and they are.
posted by zombieflanders at 6:11 AM on December 1, 2017 [18 favorites]

Yoshiyuki Tomino is a gundam national treasure.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 6:15 AM on December 1, 2017 [7 favorites]

Well this is certain to be goddamned controversial:

Nickelback is a national treasure, says Canada. Wait, what?
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 7:29 AM on December 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

Andy Serkis is a Gollum national treasure.
posted by Rock Steady at 10:39 AM on December 1, 2017 [7 favorites]

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier? It's way more overused on Metafilter than anywhere else.

Ye can have my motherfuckin' profanity when ye pry it from my goddamned fingers.
posted by zarq at 11:14 AM on December 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier? It's way more overused on Metafilter than anywhere else.

Goddamn MetaFilter.
posted by maxsparber at 11:42 AM on December 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

MetaFilter: Metafilter: Goddamn Metafilter.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 5:25 PM on December 1, 2017 [2 favorites]

While we're at it, could we do away with "goddamn" as an all-purpose modifier? It's way more overused on Metafilter than anywhere else.

Fuck no!
posted by a humble nudibranch at 11:28 PM on December 1, 2017 [1 favorite]

I think the national treasure thing is overdone but that’s because I spend 99.9% of all my MetaFilter time these days in the politics thread. Thank you Jonny Wallflower for changing your shortcut. I salute your flexibility. And also it made me smile.
posted by Bella Donna at 7:44 AM on December 2, 2017 [2 favorites]

Who will speak for the humble goddam?

Mad dog will speak for the humble goddam, because when he looks at goddam, it's almost like looking in a mirror.
posted by jamjam at 9:37 PM on December 2, 2017 [1 favorite]

JOHNNY CASH IS A NATIONAL TREASURE.

We made sure he can't ever leave the country by burying him in it.
posted by Capt. Renault at 11:24 AM on December 4, 2017 [4 favorites]

I guarangoddamntee that you must destroy your pet peeves before they eat you alive.

I will reign them in after we have a convo about the deets.
posted by flabdablet at 3:21 PM on December 4, 2017 [1 favorite]

spitbull is a national treasure
posted by klangklangston at 10:06 AM on December 5, 2017

I hear my people are talking to your people, but don't blame me if all you find behind the curtain is just one little old lady mumbling to herself.
posted by infini at 10:14 AM on December 5, 2017

flabdablet: "I will reign them in after we have a convo about the deets."

REIN. It's REIN them in.
posted by Chrysostom at 1:22 PM on December 5, 2017 [2 favorites]

I will reign them in

👑👑👑
posted by GuyZero at 1:46 PM on December 5, 2017

RAIN. I WILL RAIN THEM IN.

-IRFH
posted by The Great David S. Pumpkins at 1:52 PM on December 5, 2017 [2 favorites]

It's REIN them in.

Now don't be sad, cos one out of three ain't bad.
posted by flabdablet at 1:53 PM on December 5, 2017 [1 favorite]

For all intensive purposes I’d have to say that round goes to flabdablet.
posted by ActingTheGoat at 8:43 PM on December 5, 2017 [2 favorites]

moist kind
posted by flabdablet at 8:52 PM on December 5, 2017 [2 favorites]

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Our Great Shared National Treasures November 29, 2017 2:15 PM Subscribe

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