Metatalktail Hour: Rhymes with "Quilty Treasure"

July 2, 2022 2:48 AM

Inspired by this post, this week I'd like to ask you to share some of those secret indulgences that help to pass the time, soothe your anxiety and / or comfort your soul ... even though they may not necessarily be the hobbies or interests you'd choose to feature on your CV or dating profile.

Trashy novels? Youtube blooper reels? Weird-ass fanfic? Decadent small purchases? Reality game shows? Milk chocolate? Divulge!

Just one thing: No shame shaming (like "oh, pshaw, you shouldn't be embarrassed about *that*" OR "ew, you like *that*?")! Please allow us all the splendid, warm enveloping luxury of our own delicious personal shame! But let's keep it SFW, please.

Or just tell us what's up with you, what's on your mind, what you've been doing. Just, no shameful politics, plz + ty!

posted by taz (staff) to MetaFilter-Related at 2:48 AM (73 comments total)

This is such a small thing, but I have 3 kids (10, 8, and 6) and a job that ranks extremely high on public interaction. My guilty pleasure is that tucked away in a corner I have a small office that no one really knows about and sometimes I go up there after particularly frustrating meetings and take short naps on an incredibly comfortable sofa.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:00 AM on July 2, 2022 [21 favorites]

TBH it's Saturday evening here and I am pining for that sofa right now.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:02 AM on July 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

I have been finding myself weirdly fascinated by Youtube videos from rug cleaners or landscapers, where the rug cleaners deep-clean a rug or the landscapers find this wildly overgrown lawn and fix it up. And that's literally all that happens - 20 minutes of watching a guy go through all the steps to wash, scrub, rinse, re-scrub, re-rinse, and spin-dry a rug, or an hour watching a guy use all these different tools to power-wash a sidewalk or mow a lawn or weed-whack around a fence. I don't know why they fascinate me so, but they do.

In the "what I've been doing" - I've mentioned in other threads that I have a brand-new ice cream maker I need to inaugurate. My roommate has finally weighed in on some potential flavors, and we have the following short list now:

* dark chocolate ice cream, with peanut butter Oreos mixed in. I am also toying with adding peanut butter chips or mini peanut butter cups.

* Ample Hills' Cookie Au Lait. My roommate thinks we should also use peanut butter Oreos for this as well, and we're having a mild debate over that since i'm not quite sold on the idea of coffee and peanut butter.

* He's put in a request for butterscotch; I'm figuring out how to jazz that up. Some butterscotch recipes call for crumbled cashew praline, so maybe that; I also have some butterscotch chips I need to use up, and I may throw them in. Or chopped up Heath bar or something.

* Interestingly, I've learned that butterscotch is a popular flavor in India, so I'm considering mango sorbet to go with it.

* I've also noticed some packaged passion fruit pulp in our supermarket, and may make some passion fruit sorbet to see what that's like.

* I even have mentally bookmarked a recipe for an apple cider sorbet to make when we hit September, and apple cider starts showing up in the farmers' markets around here on a regular basis.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:08 AM on July 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

I’ve started getting massages every month. So great! Aside from the indulgence of an hour where I focus totally on ME and how my body feels, I haven’t had any lower back pain since I started.

In other news, I put my parents’ house on the market about 2 weeks ago (right when interest rates went up!)and it’s under contract now. I cannot begin to explain how relieved I am and how ready I am to have this chapter over. And in a “things come full circle” moment, the new buyers are almost exactly the same age as my parents were when they bought the house.
posted by bookmammal at 4:25 AM on July 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

I have discovered Anthony's Organic Yellow Popcorn and don't even want to admit how much I've been eating (had it both after lunch and after dinner yesterday). I pop it with avocado oil (high smoke point) and add salt and Miyoko's vegan butter (though I've had to use Earth Balance lately because Miyoko's has been out of stock here - not as good, but still fine [yes, I'm vegan - you may prefer butter]). I tried a lot of different types of popcorn over the course of the pandemic, and I think Anthony's is far and away the best.

I've also discovered it works much better if I use a Cuisinart pan instead of my usual Farberware. I don't use the Cuisinart pan often because it's a bit heavy for me, but I get a much larger volume of popped corn from a quarter cup of kernels. (People have all kinds of opinions on stovetop popcorn - so I'm just saying what I do and not that it's the One True Way.)
posted by FencingGal at 6:20 AM on July 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

WELL, CRAP -

It looks like my weekend plans are now shot to hell. I just tested positive for Covid.

I feel okay- it feels more like a cold than anything else. Just annoying as all hell.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:04 AM on July 2, 2022 [14 favorites]

Okay, I just went to take a PCR and I will find out the results in a couple days. In the meantime I will be isolating myself in my room (except when I go out to common areas, where I'll mask up; this is what my roommate and I discussed). I feel energetic enough to fix myself meals and stuff, and found someone to go get my CSA bag so that's good (especially since a couple of things in the bag are the last missing ingredients I needed for a yummy-sounding soup). If things DO start to take a turn for the worse, I work for a manufacturing company, and one of the things they make are devices for at-home Covid breathing support, so I could always ask my boss to pull something from the assembly room and send it to me.

But I suspect I'll just be bored out of my ever-loving mind for the next few days. So I plan to follow this thread with interest and try ALL y'all's guilty pleasures out. I also have these fancy-ass pajamas I may dig out and wear, because if I have to be isolating myself in a sickroom like a Victorian gentlewoman I may as well look the part.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:03 AM on July 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

For dinner tonight, I am making a homemade version of a cheez it crunchwrap, which I am hoping will go nationwide and be my new guilty pleasure food.

I rarely eat fast food but I kind of love following the various dumbass novelty junk food items that are created to generate free advertising. So I guess my other guilty pleasure is social media about junk food PR.
posted by the primroses were over at 9:07 AM on July 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

I watch survivalist shows like "Alone" on my iPad, from my comfy bed, and hector the contestants as if they can hear me and as if I have any idea what I'm talking about.

"You are burning WAY too many calories building a shelter, go catch a fish, you need protein, don't forget to eat the brains!"
posted by champers at 9:26 AM on July 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

So it's not a secret how much I love Heartstopper, but it may be how much time I spend on it and how deep into it I am. I am discord, tumblr, and AO3 levels of into Heartstopper.
The comic is great but the tv show added so much to it. (Something I've never said before about another show.)
posted by blueberry monster at 9:54 AM on July 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Hi where do I even start. Maybe least embarrassing to most embarrassing.

I love farting. Especially other people farting. Especially if it just explodes out of them all suddenly and makes you jump. Like I don't like the smell of fart but I love the noises people's butts make. When my husband lets out a really good one he just grins at me while I laugh with glee and give him a compliment on his butt trumpet solo.

Watching my cats be dramatic little divas. I know I shouldn't encourage them but it warms my soul when they leap around and make ungodly noises at the sight of whatever happens to offend them.

My mom has always spoken gibberish (so often that my sister and I were convinced that my mom invented the phrase'nosy parker') and she passed the habit on. My latest self-soothing nonsense goes "Bargledy garbledy dargledy barg" and no I don't know what it means.

Ugh. Reality TV but only the very worst* most pointless shows. Currently I am watching Big Brother Australia season 13 and it's very satisfyingly terrible.

*I'm not exaggerating. I can't get enough of the train wreck that is Sister Wives. I have no excuse. I do not recommend watching it if you have a soul.

Thanks for the opportunity to confess my sins. I'm way too witchy and unbelieving to get anywhere near a priest so this was nice.
posted by RobinofFrocksley at 11:41 AM on July 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

You know what?

I REALLY like “How You Remind Me” by Nickelback. Not ironically. Not hate-love. I just like that song.

Enough that I bought the album, which is bad.
posted by obfuscation at 12:57 PM on July 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

I listened to that song in the car yesterday! Well, the first half. I enjoy it and like singing along but it gets repetitive to me in the end.

In The End… another nostalgia song I should hate but love!
posted by Night_owl at 2:43 PM on July 2, 2022

Victorian-era true crime stories. The bleaker, darker, and more upsetting, the better.
posted by mochapickle at 3:02 PM on July 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

I have yet to actually try Flamin’ Hot Mtn Dew, because I don’t usually drink the sugary sodas anymore. I’m tempted, though.
So much so that I bought a can of Tribucha Controlled Burn Ginger, Cayenne and Turmeric flavored kombucha, as an ostensibly less-shitty trial run.
It was surprisingly okay.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:06 PM on July 2, 2022

I don’t really do “guilty pleasures” any more in the sense that either I’m not ashamed enough of the stuff I like to call it that, or it’s NSFW.

Varying health things make me steer clear of a lot of former food indulgences. But when I was younger I used to like to microwave sliced cheese until it got really melty, back before I discovered quesadillas.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:20 PM on July 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

late night vice cluster of thc, junk food, caffeine, and superhero media. apparently i was deprived as a child, or something
posted by slappy_pinchbottom at 3:36 PM on July 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

I am currently writing a long book review, and between paragraphs I have been playing Nethack. It's a reliable, if sometimes frustrating, procrastination strategy (recent ridiculous deaths have included being blasted by a kobold carrying a wand of lightning and being bitten to death by a newt after getting paralyzed by a trapped chest). Building dollhouse furniture has also become a useful distraction from, uh, things--the pieces for a new tallboy are sitting on my craft table even as I type.
posted by thomas j wise at 4:04 PM on July 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

I've been playing Angband, Tolkien-esque rogue-like, as a distraction while working for 25 years now. I leave it open on my laptop all the time so that I can dive in and complete a level when I need a break from work or life.
posted by mollweide at 4:25 PM on July 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

I've never had much of a sweet tooth - that's not to say I don't like chocolate, ice cream, etc., just that I can generally do without or be satisfied with only a bite or two. But...occasionally, once or twice a year at most, I get a craving. I'll buy a large bag of the mini Reese's peanut butter cups (not even the Trader Joe's dark chocolate ones! I know, right?) and nibble a few at a time in the mid-afternoons or later in the evenings. The bag rarely lasts two weeks. By the time it's gone so are my cravings, and I'm happily back to ignoring sweet stuff for months.
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:37 PM on July 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

I also kinda like videos of people trying Buckley's mixture for the first time. I am not Canadian, but was introduced to it when it was briefly sold in drug stores in the US and I swear by it now. It tastes hideous, yeah, but HOLY SHIT is it effective.

....I just had some a little while ago to quell my Covid cough. And I cry foul because - I always thought Covid dulled your sense of smell and taste, and that stuff tasted just as foul as it always has. (I had to warn my roommate not to be alarmed if he heard me gagging and retching.)

It worked, but I still tasted it. I cry foul.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:16 PM on July 2, 2022

Eh, seems like I have no secrets, at least not any that won't get deleted.

Trashy novels? Youtube blooper reels? Weird-ass fanfic? Decadent small purchases? Reality game shows? Milk chocolate? Divulge!

Just one thing: No shame shaming (like "oh, pshaw, you shouldn't be embarrassed about *that*" OR "ew, you like *that*?")! Please allow us all the splendid, warm enveloping luxury of our own delicious personal shame! But let's keep it SFW, please.

Guess not.
posted by zengargoyle at 6:40 PM on July 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

How about I occasionally browse the internet looking for doppelgangers of old friends that I don't have pictures of. I don't have pictures, the few I had are long lost. But when I find a time machine displaced doppelganger, I keep it to build up the photo album.
posted by zengargoyle at 6:52 PM on July 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

At the start of the pandemic and full time WFH, I indulged in far too much premium ice cream – salted-caramel with chocolate chunks. 20 pounds and 1 insurrection later and I decided I needed something that would last longer than a pint and not drive up my triglycerides. I was watching a ton of YouTube videos and Netflix (like most folks) but the news and most Western media made me feel so much more anxious. I needed shows that weren’t about white men, or glorify guns, or reference US politics even remotely, so I started watching Korean dramas. At first, I was truly ashamed and couldn’t bring myself to discuss it with anyone except on somewhat anonymous internet sites (like FanFare). But I finally decided not to feel guilty about my pleasures. Life is hard and I deserve to like what I like. I very recently admitted my obsession to some close friends and their response was basically a blank stare – like “What’s a kdrama?” It was only something to feel guilty about in my own head.
posted by kbar1 at 6:55 PM on July 2, 2022 [8 favorites]

Putting a bunch of chocolate chips into a mug, then melting it in the microwave and eating it with a spoon. I just use the bog standard nestle's semi-sweet, so it's not even particularly high quality chocolate. But I just love it. Definite comfort food.

Also, count me in as another person who gets into really horrible reality TV shows. It's my big comfort viewing when I'm completely worn down and can't focus on anything and need to turn my brain off. America's next top model is the big one - I've re-watched all seasons multiple times over the years since it first came on air. I think the one I'm most ashamed of is "Dance Moms" - I only made it through the first season or two before I just couldn't take it anymore. Definitely kind of hated myself for watching it. Whatever.

The last one is fanfiction - although I feel like it's become a bit more, well, maybe not mainstream, but not something that I feel quite as ashamed about. My sort of "comfort reading" version of this is to go back to the Harry Potter part of AO3, b/c that was the fandom where I first got my start when I was still a kid.
posted by litera scripta manet at 3:21 AM on July 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have gotten into paranormal cozy mysteries/romances -- the cozy part is because I really don't enjoy explicit sex scenes. The best of the bunch, in case you'd like to try, are from Kristen Painter, especially her Nocturne Falls series. They are set in a town that celebrates Halloween all year 'round as a way to hide actual witches, shifters, vampires, etc. from the public (there is also magic water that helps). I find them nice and low-key drama (which is all I can take these days). She has other series that are good and, she has allowed other writers to create stories in her universe (with greater/lesser success).
posted by agatha_magatha at 9:59 AM on July 3, 2022 [4 favorites]

I'm still on a quest for the perfect ginger beer. For a long time, it was made by Belvoir and stupidly expensive. It disappeared off the shelves (unlike its elderflower cousin) and I was worried I'd never see it again. Recently, it reappeared with a new label touting its organic nature, and I think the recipe has changed considerably so it doesn't taste the same. My new favorite is by Q, which doesn't have the citrusy flavor I used to enjoy in the Belvoir variety, but it's not overly sweet yet spicy enough to make me cough.

I haven't been able to find any confirmation about the changed Belvoir recipe, but there was something I enjoyed about the non-organic variety that's not present in the organic one. I hope that what I'm missing isn't HFCS.

Headed to an outdoor event today with my band — we're the headliner playing right before tonight's fireworks. I'm looking forward to this short work week, but dreading returning from vacation to begin prep for a colonoscopy.
posted by emelenjr at 10:25 AM on July 3, 2022

Normal Gossip, a podcast wherein the host tells a minor celebrity guest a gossipy true story from a "friend of a friend," pausing periodically for outbursts from the guest and also to ask the guest, "What should they do next?"

It's not celebrity gossip: it's NORMAL gossip. So it is packed full of some normal person's deliciously hideously embarrassing details: the exact thing you almost have a heart attack waiting to hear from your friend about your mutual friend, but since you don't know anybody involved and names and identifying information are all changed, so nobody's getting doxxed, and nothing lethal or really life-destroying happens, you don't have the crushing responsibility to keep the secret and you don't have to feel any guilt for listening. It's gossip... but there's no emotional tax!

The stories are like, "their friend fucked them over on their group vacation in a spectacular manner here are the deets" and "high jinks over the headsets among the closing shift barristae at this one starbucks where the manager is unbearable and there is a new hire who is a total doofus who should have been fired yesterday but they all tolerate him... for reasons."

It. Is. Delectable.

Usually I fast forward through the intro where we get to know the guest and just jet right to the salacity.
posted by Don Pepino at 10:59 AM on July 3, 2022 [8 favorites]

Metafilter: right to the salacity.
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:46 AM on July 3, 2022 [3 favorites]

uh oh. I think I just found a new one.
posted by taz (staff) at 11:47 AM on July 3, 2022 [5 favorites]

oh taz. I'm the worst Quaker ever because I laughed at so many of these!
posted by QuakerMel at 12:12 PM on July 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I love watching people get things unstuck on YouTube . Matt’s Off Road Recovery, trailmater, others- I enjoy watching the problem solve if and, of course, offering my own commentary to the screen.
posted by rockindata at 12:25 PM on July 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

Those damned american cheese slices, those cursed croissant-in-a-rolls, those born-from-hell-lil'smokies, all rolled up and baked until golden brown. Eaten for the next week as a snack, a meal, a meal snack or a snack snack then a meal...
posted by winesong at 1:24 PM on July 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

Macaroni and Cheese.

It is good microwaved from the box for a quick meal.
It is a delightful crockpot full of pot-luck offering.
It's what's for breakfast.
It's good breaded with panko and fried nice and crispy.
It's good cold-sliced and placed on top of a salad.
It's the best dogdamn midnight snack ever.
posted by mightshould at 2:43 PM on July 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I've just eaten my first miniature Christmas pudding of the season. And it was great.
posted by Wordshore at 3:04 PM on July 3, 2022 [3 favorites]

Macaroni and Cheese

This is your occasional reminder that if you haven't tried the 3 ingredient version, you should. It is SO fucking easy it's ridiculous, and it can be easily scaled to any quantity desired.

...just, y'know, don't confuse the evaporated milk with condensed milk. That ... that is not good.
posted by aramaic at 4:58 PM on July 3, 2022 [9 favorites]

Tonight in celebration of the 4th of July (despite, well, things...), I made good ol' Murican Yankee pot roast using a recipe I've mentioned before. The only additions were - since fireworks have been banned in my city due to fire hazard - a couple tablespoons of ginger paste into the pot plus a generous dash of hot sauce on the finished product to add some bang and sizzle. So satisfying!!
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:00 PM on July 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

I occasionally open a can of sweetened condensed milk and just eat it straight, with a spoon.
posted by clew at 9:19 PM on July 3, 2022 [6 favorites]

I’m endlessly fascinated by the car crash and epic fail (esp. heavy machinery) videos. I only let myself go down that rabbit hole once or twice a month, but I can burn an hour or two just wondering “what were they thinking?” Because seriously, what were they thinking?
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:21 PM on July 3, 2022

Once in a while (like...two to three times a year, so I figure it's not all that bad) I get a one or two pound box of chocolates and eat them all by myself over a couple days and don't share. It's not even all that good chocolate, it's drugstore chocolate (which I know is problematic on many axes. The quality of the Whitman's Sampler has gone seriously downhill lately, so that may be what switches me over to ordering from a better source.)

Sometimes I get two so I can share the other one. I have a lot of weird restrictive things about food and this is one of the symptoms. One weird trick that helps me not be a weirdo and cuts down on both Entire Chocolate Box Incidents and episodes of unhealthy restriction is that I keep a drawer with candy in it at home, so I can have some whenever I want (and have the reassurance that I can always have some.) If the Senate can have a candy drawer, so can I.
posted by blnkfrnk at 11:36 PM on July 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have been finding myself weirdly fascinated by Youtube videos from rug cleaners or landscapers,

Oh those are like catnip to me too, but I ran into them on TikTok where the typically shorter duration of the videos is more suitable for my short attention span. There are a LOT of them on there. It’s definitely a thing. Vicarious sense of accomplishment or something like that.

My current guiltiest pleasure that I have kept a secret from everyone is I’m bingeing on the Paranormal Activity franchise, like, the whole series of what seven or eight movies, which unsurprisingly get progressively worse in terms of quality and ridiculousness but I’m having fun watching them in secret. I used to watch a lot of horror movies then stopped when I was depressed and now I’m a bit better I’m finding them entertaining again. Weird how that works.
posted by bitteschoen at 2:50 AM on July 4, 2022

This is some of the best chocolate out there.
posted by wittgenstein at 5:39 AM on July 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Devil's Rancher, you might like the That Looked Expensive twitter feed. Lots of crane regret.
posted by taz (staff) at 7:42 AM on July 4, 2022 [3 favorites]

I also love ALL "bad real estate" clickbait. For example, here's Structural Inspectors Spotted Horrifying Things on Bored Panda. Of course, I also love all choke-on-your-own-envy-spit gorgeous real estate clickbait. Basically, if it's estatey and baity, I'm here for it.
posted by taz (staff) at 11:39 AM on July 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Supermarket thrillers. I don't know what it's like in other countries, but when you look at the fiction shelves in Tesco, the bulk of them are obviously aimed at women, and it's a weird mixture of the incredibly twee and the incredibly dark. "The Little Yorkshire Chocolate Shop and Library" in pastels and cursive, nuzzled up against "THE DAY SHE DIED" in stark white capitals on a moody dark background. Well, turns out I treat the dark ones like popcorn; I'm a bit selective, but I can inhale a whole bucket of them without really noticing. I usually get them as cheap ebooks now rather than actually buying them from the supermarket, which saves me having to find space for them on the stacks of books destined for the charity shop, and also lets me whip through everything a given author has written, one after another.

It's weird, because what I *actually* like is fantasy, science fiction, and clever detective novels, with the odd foray into the literary or YA shelves. But sometimes what I need is popcorn.

Also, salt and vinegar crisps. They come in six-packs. I am wholly capable of eating an entire six-pack at a sitting.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 12:02 PM on July 4, 2022 [4 favorites]

Okay I have a new item - in another thread someone linked to a video by a Finnish woman who likes cleaning people's houses for free. I'm about 20 minutes into the most recent video and I am IN LOVE - you've got the satisfying cleaning-stuff genre, and then combined with the good-deeds angle, and she also adds some tips that I 100% am going to use.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:26 PM on July 4, 2022 [8 favorites]

The can opener bridge. The website is 11foot8.com and it's literally just videos of one bridge where tall trucks don't make it under.

I was doing acupuncture for reasons and now those reasons are gone, but I keep going once a week hoping that another reason will come to be. I feel a little guilty about spending the money, but the healing power of being fussed over is strong.
posted by bilabial at 12:27 PM on July 4, 2022 [3 favorites]

I feel bad about how much I love Lay's Limón potato chips. Like, it's Frito-Lay, a terrible company, and it's basically bad for you to eat them, health-wise, but. My whole life, I have never had portion control problems; I will basically eat what I want and then be fine, I've never had an "I can't stop" type of food situation (which has been a constant issue with my weight because people are always telling me I should eat less blah blah blah). But those goddamn chips obliterate my portion control control. They are so citrusy! And salty! And potato-y! And right now, they have disappeared from every single place I bought them; Lay's doesn't seem to indicate they've been discontinued but not a single store anywhere in my area is carrying them anymore. I feel like I need to stalk the Lay's guy if he ever pops up at my local grocery to see if he can tell me what's what. The thought of living forever without them is really depressing.
posted by kitten kaboodle at 3:27 PM on July 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have a very serious weakness for overly processed snack food that contrasts heavily with with my generally foodie tendencies. I've been eyeing those Lay's Limón chips for a while. I generally don't like Lay's, but there's something compelling about that flavor. I semi-regrettably just finished a canister of Pringle's elote flavored "chips" and it was just about everything I expected it to be, good and bad. I guess I should grab a bag before they disappear from my local Stop&Shop. If they still have them and you want me to send you one, kitten kaboodle, I'd be happy to do so.
posted by mollweide at 6:12 PM on July 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Dude, I also consider myself a foodie, and my motto is there are just times when ONLY the fake shit will do. Embrace it.

It's like this great line the character Death has in one of Neil Gaiman's comics - she's happily eating a streetcart hot dog and she says something like, "I've always wondered if the chemical aftertaste in these things is intentional, or if it's just an accidental bonus."
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:45 PM on July 4, 2022

I love watching people get things unstuck on YouTube . Matt’s Off Road Recovery, trailmater, others- I enjoy watching the problem solve if and, of course, offering my own commentary to the screen.
These videos have taken over my life! Ever since discovering MORR here on MeFi a few months ago, I can't get enough of them and similar channels like FabRats.
posted by dg at 10:13 PM on July 4, 2022

So, this one small detail is making me a little crazy, and I need to get it out of my head. I said earlier that I found this "instant regret" twitter account, and there's one post there that is now showing up for me on other feeds as well, so I keep seeing it, which keeps making me think (way too much) about this: In this video, a man tries to kick a dog (cw for that, though he fails to connect). The thing that's weird is he never takes his left hand out of his pocket. Not when he tries to kick (maybe part of why he's unbalanced?), not when he falls, like automatically to try to break the fall, not when he's staggering trying to get up. ???? Is this quite odd, or am I quite odd for hyperfocusing on that? Both? (also, fuck that guy, of course.)
posted by taz (staff) at 12:06 AM on July 5, 2022

Injured or prosthetic maybe.
posted by Mitheral at 6:10 AM on July 5, 2022

I am ALL ABOUT audiobooks of adventurous young women from past times investigating things with a touch of steampunk science fiction and romance thrown in. Veronica Speedwell, The Alchemist's Daughter (sadly only three novels in that series), Greta Helsing, The Parasol Protectorate universe, Marion Lane... I cannot get enough.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 6:21 AM on July 5, 2022 [2 favorites]

The can opener bridge. The website is 11foot8.com and it's literally just videos of one bridge where tall trucks don't make it under.

The weird thing is that clearly visible in the camera angle is the sign telling motorists the bridge height is 12’4”, so who knows how people misunderstand the clearance? 🤷‍♂️
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:13 AM on July 5, 2022

Just in case you weren't aware, that bridge has a history (or running joke, depending on one's personal sense of humor) of an ever-increasing number of signs and warnings - including a bar over the roadway leading up to it that clangs against too-tall trucks so they can re-route before it's too late - and idiots ignoring them all.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:46 AM on July 5, 2022 [2 favorites]

Twining's English Breakfast Tea to start the day.
A large glass of San Pellegrino with four Super Colossal Spanish Queen Olives with dinner.
posted by kirkaracha at 2:56 PM on July 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

ricochet biscuit, if I remember correctly, they semi-recently raised the bridge 6 inches (but that’s all they can do; they aren’t able to raise it further because !reasons), which wasn’t enough to bring it in line with typical modern clearances.
posted by Night_owl at 3:15 PM on July 5, 2022

I started rewatching the Bachelor/Bachelorette for the first time since college during COVID, and it has been giving me so much unbridled joy. Can't wait for the next season.
posted by mostly vowels at 4:18 PM on July 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

Hunting stuff for cosplays. I mean, I don't go to cons, so why?! But it's fun. I have a tolerable Aziraphale and a quite good Madame Tracy. I'm most of the way to a Sybil Ramkin (need to figure out how to style her wig+tiara) and partway to an Agnes Nutter (shockingly difficult, actually).
posted by humbug at 5:30 PM on July 5, 2022 [2 favorites]

Really bad cozy mysteries. I am so embarrassed that I read these things, even as I'm reading them I'm always thinking: that cat has better things to do than solve a human murder, or, if I was the ghost of your grandmother I would sure as hell have better things to do than help you solve some stupid obvious murder. But I can't stop. When I'm tired or not feeling great or just need to lay in bed, I read them by the bucketful. You would not believe how many of them there are out there or that there is in fact a specific subgenre I like to call paranormal cozy mystery romance. Unfortunately even I must draw the line somewhere and I had to give up my Kindle unlimited subscription when it started serving me semi-identical novels featuring a dead grandmother's feisty ghost, an inherited magic lighthouse / bookstore / cupcake cafe, two interchangeable but oh so eligible bachelors and a murder a child could solve in five minutes flat. I think they're being written by AIs. That would be okay but some of the AIs really, really can't write and even I draw the line when the prose gets unbearably clunky.
posted by mygothlaundry at 9:52 AM on July 6, 2022 [9 favorites]

I think they're being written by AIs. That would be okay but some of the AIs really, really can't write

Snorting with fellow feeling.
posted by clew at 10:23 AM on July 6, 2022 [3 favorites]

mygothlaundry, have you read the Monica Ferris needlwork mysteries series? The mysteries are pretty OK and the characters are memorable. There are a lot of long, calming descriptions of knitting and such. After the 6th or 7th in the series they get kind of formulaic, but so what?

If you haven't read the Family Skeleton mysteries by Leigh Perry, those are similarly good. Spoiler, the family has an ambulatory, aware, speaking skeleton who likes bone puns and helps solve crimes. I am not making this up. They seem to be right up your alley (and mine.)

I have considered writing a cozy mystery, but then reality hits me: writing a bunch of murders would bother my conscience, and so would writing anything where the police serve justice. On the other hand, it is fiction and you're allowed to make things up. And I'm a slightly better writer than an AI.
posted by blnkfrnk at 10:43 AM on July 6, 2022 [4 favorites]

Re-playing Dragon Age, the entire series, and making all the problematic romantic choices. Zevran! Anders! Solas! Then yelling at the screen at them. It is a great substitute for all the cis men I cannot yell at.
posted by corb at 9:11 PM on July 6, 2022 [2 favorites]

Because I can, I'm going to complain about the economics of cozies for a hot minute. OK, look, how many cupcake cafes do you see around you? As in, that's all they serve: cupcakes. I didn't think so. What about places that serve only tea? How are they doing? NOT VERY WELL. Scrapbooking shops in the French quarter? Have you priced commercial real estate in the French quarter? Vintage clothing? There's a reason those shops are usually in the outskirts and look a bit dilapidated. And if the owner keeps dashing out the door to shadow people, all these adorable businesses are going to do even less well. I have terrible news for you: restaurants in particular are really hard work and you don't get to just leave because the handsome sheriff feels like company while he's swinging by a crime scene. Libraries don't take kindly to librarians who keep running out the door. Bookstores need staff, the whole staff and if you're the owner, even more so.

I know, I know, these are fantasies, hand wavium economics, but sometimes it drives me crazy. I can believe in your mystery solving cat and friendly neighborhood ghosts more easily than I can believe in your damn cupcake cafe.
posted by mygothlaundry at 9:22 AM on July 7, 2022 [6 favorites]

Oh! A variant on pretty shop daydream guilty pleasure: Victoria magazine. Not only is it full of impractical pictures of pretty clutter, described as businesses, but also their aesthetic is Edwardian more than Victorian.
posted by clew at 11:33 AM on July 7, 2022

I have considered writing a cozy mystery, but then reality hits me: writing a bunch of murders would bother my conscience

Some cozy mysteries are good at representing a community fixing itself rather than being fixed by outside authorities.
posted by clew at 11:35 AM on July 7, 2022 [4 favorites]

That's very true; in many cases it's the cat or the shop owner or something who shows up the police by solving the mystery, which is part of the appeal.

I really like those that solve a historical mystery that reunites relatives or makes provenance of an object clear. It just bothers me that it's murder murder murder all the time.
posted by blnkfrnk at 1:17 PM on July 7, 2022 [2 favorites]

You could write a historical one in which people assumed it was murder but it turns out it wasn’t?
posted by clew at 2:29 PM on July 7, 2022 [2 favorites]

There's also people solving cold cases that police have long since abandoned (which again, doesn't need to be a murder).

It is probably somewhat of a spoiler to recommend a book after that, but for a somewhat meatier mystery than you've been reading (but with these themes) and very queer, have you tried The Missing Page by Cat Sebastian? It could give some ideas of how to write in this direction.
posted by blueberry monster at 9:51 AM on July 8, 2022 [1 favorite]

The mystery talk twigged me that i do have one; i like the Reacher novels and stories in that ilk. Man with a simple life goes from place to place and continously stumbles across people who are acting above the law and then administers the beat down the system can't before skipping town.

Of course unlike real vigilante justice the targets are never innocent nor inflicted with a disproportionate outcome. And Reacher rarely violates the civil rights of innocent people
posted by Mitheral at 10:13 AM on July 8, 2022 [1 favorite]

Fridge restocking videos, even if they reveal how much sugar we all eat. I find the relocation of eggs from carton to those plastic egg trays kind of weird, though.
posted by The Adventure Begins at 1:52 PM on July 8, 2022 [1 favorite]

blueberry monster, I have read that; I was just thinking that I enjoyed it because it's an unconventional mystery. The sequel too. I'd have to play with that idea more.

My dad loves the Jack Reacher novels, too. I've been meaning to pick those up.
posted by blnkfrnk at 3:04 PM on July 8, 2022