❤️💘💝💖💗💓💞💕💟❣ 💔❤ 🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍💋💌🌹🍫

February 14, 2020 12:06 PM

Whether you celebrate St. Valentine's Day or not, let's make this a space to send love to one another. That includes yourself, your partner, your family, your lover, your neighbor, anyone and everyone, we are all worthy of love and kindness. Feel free to share how you're celebrating or not celebrating. Also, a reminder that chocolate is going to be super cheap and on sale tomorrow. Happy St. Valentine's Day!
posted by Fizz to MetaFilter-Related at 12:06 PM (64 comments total)

I have a plumber, his name is Chad. He's been hard to get and my tub has been draining poorly now for months (part of this was getting the landlady to call Chad). He showed up today, we were dressed alike (black carhartts, darn tough socks, hoodies) and proceeded to get a bunch of scunge out of my tub including a DRAIN STOPPER (not mine) that had somehow gotten wedged in the pipe someplace.

He said sorry he was delayed but a buddy of his had a midlife crisis and went to Argentina where he was living it up "like a 17 year old" and his work partner headed down to Argentina to fetch him home. Not the story I was expecting about why he'd taken so long.

I've been hanging out here modding while Team Mod does some work stuff and it's been a gentle day of slow progress and I appreciate that. Hugs all around.
posted by jessamyn (temp) at 12:13 PM on February 14, 2020 [37 favorites]

My parents put my cat to sleep this morning. Apparently, she’d been ill for the past few days. She had a really good fifteen years, but deaths have seemed to coincided with packing to move house and here I am yet again. It’ll be fine, I am loved, but feeling sad and liminal right now.

Also, we took a break from boxes and went out to the pub earlier where I fell up the stairs, spilling my partner’s lager everywhere. It was embarrassing and my knees still hurt.
posted by iamkimiam at 12:28 PM on February 14, 2020 [21 favorites]

I'm sorry to hear about your cat iamkimiam, but glad you have good memories. Sending love and unspilled beer your way.
posted by Fizz at 12:31 PM on February 14, 2020 [3 favorites]

I should also add a chocolate update... earlier in the day we stopped by the Lindt store and filled a bag of our favourites. This has provided many small joys and much comfort.

(They also tried to sell us on buying 13 more sweets to get 15% off and I’m really proud of my partner who quickly did the maths in the queue, emphatically said NOPE and saved us from some annoying regret.)
posted by iamkimiam at 12:33 PM on February 14, 2020 [4 favorites]

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Metafilter is awesome.
I ♥ all of you!
posted by Lynsey at 12:33 PM on February 14, 2020 [23 favorites]

Here is a short video about the world's smallest cat. It made me smile, so I'm sharing it with all of you.
posted by Fizz at 12:42 PM on February 14, 2020 [7 favorites]

Peace and love to all.
posted by AugustWest at 12:43 PM on February 14, 2020 [2 favorites]

I vanquished a stressful project today.

Also the boy I like wished me happy valentine's day and I feel like I'm 12 years old not a middle aged divorced person.

Love you all!
posted by wellred at 12:48 PM on February 14, 2020 [15 favorites]

I got y'all some flowers and a card.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:53 PM on February 14, 2020 [17 favorites]

Om nom nom and peace and love to everyone.
posted by XMLicious at 1:09 PM on February 14, 2020 [3 favorites]

Today is my kid’s birthday and I’m remembering the day four years ago when he arrived slimy and yowling out of a hole they sliced in my abdomen.
Valentine’s Day has never been the same since.

Happy Valentine’s Day for those celebrating and happy day before half priced chocolate to those not celebrating.
posted by sciencegeek at 1:42 PM on February 14, 2020 [17 favorites]

Happy birthday to sciencekid! and happy Valentine's day all around!
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 1:47 PM on February 14, 2020 [3 favorites]

My husband and I spent the last two days putting together a piece of flatpack furniture. There is obviously no love more true than one that can weather this ordeal. ❤️ forever. Tonight (night on this continent, anyway) the mefi staff had the first of our anti-oppression workshops, and that was also quite excellent, also with a lot of complex and intersecting parts and pieces, also very rewarding. Now a glass of wine, or maybe two. The chocolate can wait a bit.
posted by taz (staff) at 1:51 PM on February 14, 2020 [13 favorites]

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone!

I just opened many wonderful cards from the Valentine's swap and it made me very happy! Thanks again to the primroses were over for making it happen!

General hugs to anyone who needs them!

Also, I would like to register my anger that the local grocery store pulls all the Valentine's candy off the shelves at the end of the day and does not put anything on sale the next day. It all just disappears. It's probably for the best, but I would like to make my own sale candy choices.
posted by danabanana at 2:15 PM on February 14, 2020 [7 favorites]

I'm trying out they/them pronouns and being kind to myself.

Happy February 14 y'all. =)
posted by curious nu at 2:34 PM on February 14, 2020 [28 favorites]

Never been a fan of Valentine's Day but I succumb because it's kind of hard not to. Every year we donate to NPR and have them send the roses to my mom and every year she's still surprised and she calls and she's super happy to get them.

I brought home some roses for my wife today and she's cooking corned beef and making cupcakes. Got a fire going and just sort of relaxing with nothing else planned.

I don't think my kid has acknowledged the day, but she's kind of that way about these sorts of things.

As I've gotten older, less cynical, and as I've dropped and stomped on the homophobia I was raised with I've discovered the importance of genuinely loving friends and showing them with a hug or a kind word. I consider y'all my friends and I'm grateful you're all here.
posted by bondcliff at 2:57 PM on February 14, 2020 [19 favorites]

The Valentines I've received in the swap have buoyed me through this shit-tastic week.

If you're struggling, know there's someone out here who sees you for the beautifully imperfect being we all are, and thinks you're doing great just by continuing to breathe and reading this.
Also, your hair and butt look great today.
posted by ApathyGirl at 3:10 PM on February 14, 2020 [13 favorites]

I have a plumber, his name is Chad. He's been hard to get and my tub has been draining poorly now for months (part of this was getting the landlady to call Chad). He showed up today, we were dressed alike (black carhartts, darn tough socks, hoodies) and proceeded to get a bunch of scunge out of my tub including a DRAIN STOPPER (not mine) that had somehow gotten wedged in the pipe someplace.

This has to be one of the most erotically charged paragraphs to appear on MetaFilter. The porn set up. The complementarity of kindred souls. The earthiness. The metaphor. Everything but a pay off. But all good writers keep us wanting more I suppose.
posted by biffa at 3:14 PM on February 14, 2020 [30 favorites]

It is February 15 in Japan, the last full day of my two-week vacation here before I fly back home. Yesterday, I went to Jinbocho, the used book district of Tokyo, and bought some great books to take home, including a dictionary of handwritten forms of Chinese characters, a full explication of Confucius's Analects, and the original picture book of Chirin's Bell.
posted by J.K. Seazer at 3:32 PM on February 14, 2020 [1 favorite]

I bought my wife tickets for the local minor league baseball team, which were delivered to her at work by the team mascot. She runs the after school program at a school so there were 150+ kids there that thought it was really awesome that the team mascot came to visit Mrs. COD.

And that friends, is how you get away with buying your wife baseball tickets for Valentine's Day.

And she got me soccer tickets. So we will be spending a lot of time at the ballpark / soccer pitch this summer.
posted by COD at 3:34 PM on February 14, 2020 [16 favorites]

Feline good because I'm fintastic; a bright and shiny carbon allotrope. My glittering heart otter say "Happy Valentine's day". It has been discerned that magical unicorn friends such as us mefites flamingo together. Which is to say that today, I say; hurray! for a card flur-ray; a day of fun: the metafilter way; with a bonus enigma in a pear tree.


Huzzah for all the Valentine's day cards. And especially for the card'tastic organizer: the primroses were over and all the good cardsenders.
posted by mightshould at 3:36 PM on February 14, 2020 [6 favorites]

My sweetie is taking me out for TACOS. He has cracked my Valentine code!
posted by HotToddy at 3:48 PM on February 14, 2020 [8 favorites]

I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!! <3 AND [+] FOR EVERYBODY AND YOUR LOVED ONES AND PETS TOO!


I'm stuck at work until at least 7 pm tonight for a second-shift Shoemobile visit. But! I did get to take a very long lunch break and had lunch with the boyfriend today, which was great. And, tomorrow we are taking a small trip tomorrow to see a production of Hedwig and the Angry Inch in Milwaukee, stopping at a place called Apple Holler for lunch on the way up, which looks like an experience. Then, Sunday I am giving part of a sermon at my church for the first time, eeeep.

I got such lovely Valentines in the mail, thank you the primroses were over for organizing! I also, earlier this week, got myself a huge bag of individually wrapped Godiva chocolates with the intention of sharing them at work, but somehow they remain at my house, metered out 2/day in my lunchbag.
posted by Sparky Buttons at 3:49 PM on February 14, 2020 [12 favorites]

We celebrate a sort of Anti-Valentine's with the least romantic things possible. Today will be hard to beat: we wished each other a Happy Valentine's Day at 4 this morning while cleaning up cat puke.

I'm working late but have chocolate and cards from the Valentine exchange and enough leftovers that I don't need to cook tonight!

»-(¯`·.·´¯)->MEFITES<-(¯`·.·´¯)-«
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 3:50 PM on February 14, 2020 [8 favorites]

p.s.

my nayme is chab
wen tub is clog
i clear it out
without a snog
i may be late
must blame the skype
but our clothes match
i fix the pipe
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 3:51 PM on February 14, 2020 [67 favorites]

Omg I just remembered—and can’t believe I forgot until now—this is the one-year anniversary of my divorce! I can’t believe how much better my life is now. Holy hell.

It’s also the third anniversary of the day I brought my dog home. That’s one of the reasons he’s named Dovey. He’s my Lovey Dove! He’s turned into the most affectionate dog I’ve ever had and I adore him.
posted by HotToddy at 3:54 PM on February 14, 2020 [17 favorites]

No Valentines exchanged in the Dork house today. I thought I was going to pick one up at the grocery store today, he thought he'd grab one for me on the way home from work, but as it turned out neither of us left the house. It was friggin' cold out there today! So I worked from home and he enjoyed a PTO day. I called him a loser when he confessed his lack of a card for me, and he called me a loser back when I confessed the same. I did make us an apple crisp in the afternoon, so all was not lost.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 4:27 PM on February 14, 2020 [6 favorites]

Oh oh oh! I bought milk on the way home tonight, and find my neighbor has left me sugar cookies!!!!!

Milk and cookies tonight!!!
posted by mightshould at 4:34 PM on February 14, 2020 [10 favorites]

Dear Metafilter. Happy Valentines, but... I kinda think of you as a friend, sorry.

Seriously though, after moving in to care for my mum and now flooded in (well at least the bushfires are out!) I’ve felt pretty isolated. But I know I can always come here and ask for help or just hang out with an awesome bunch of people.

Love, your lurker NinaZer0
posted by ninazer0 at 4:34 PM on February 14, 2020 [16 favorites]

My construction paper mailbox doesn't have anything in it. Nobody choo-choo chooses me?
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 4:38 PM on February 14, 2020 [7 favorites]

Had a lovely evening with mrfeet on the 14th, talking on the phone with people on both sides of our family who didn't think that a Friday night corresponding with Valentine's Day might be a date night for a couple celebrating their last childless Valentine's Day. Kind of disappointed because I have been experiencing a pregnancy related dip in my libido. There's always tomorrow, we thought.

Today we discovered that we have had at least one mouse in the house that has pooped everywhere including making it up on to the kitchen bench. Since preggo tiredness, back to school, oppressive heat of summer has added to a general tendency to untidyness, there are piles of stuff to be gone through, evaluated, decontaminated and cleaned up. Basically the whole house needs to be deep cleaned and all hidey holes removed- nothing on the floor except for the furniture. I've been overwhelmed to tears.

I am so angry. There will be no trap and release.
posted by freethefeet at 4:39 PM on February 14, 2020 [5 favorites]

I most of the day off just to finally catch my breath. We've been off our game for a month now, during which we each lost a parent, and we're both in intense work cycles right now, and I have not really been able to tend to normal life at all. I managed to make a tiny dent in overdue garden prep for the season, did one of those shopping runs that's almost entirely toilet paper/paper towels/laundry detergent/shampoo etc. After having no real appetite I finally got a craving for an old favorite Lebanese roasted chicken dish, where the chicken is good but the tomatoes roasted in chicken fat and lemon juice are astounding, and that's prepped to go in the oven. I feel bad for my poor sweetheart who has to navigate Santa Monica and the Westside on a Friday Valentines to get home.

I did buy a card, but at the moment have no idea where I put it. Luckily I also bought some mint chocolate Kit Kats.
posted by Lyn Never at 4:51 PM on February 14, 2020 [8 favorites]

I treated myself to home made lasagna tonight. I have never made lasagna before (it seemed like...a lot of steps?) but Smitten Kitchen had a recipe on Instagram this morning that looked good and so I thought I’d give it a try. It took three hours! And all of my bowls! And also it turned out that I did not have hot tap water in which to soak the noodles so there was some improvisation! And also I had to move the cat off the counter sixteen times. And then I realized I didn’t have foil, so at the 20 minute mark it started to burn a little and had to be removed from the oven early. IT WAS STILL DELICIOUS. I mean, we all know that Smitten Kitchen is fantastic but I am here to testify! Also I have a lot of ricotta left if anyone has any suggestions.
posted by janepanic at 6:10 PM on February 14, 2020 [11 favorites]

Today was a weird day, in that I didn’t work for the first time since before Thanksgiving. It’s not 8 hr days everyday, but it’s exhausting cumulatively. I deleted all the work apps from my phone until Tuesday. Brunch in the sun, browsing magazines, watched my husband and daughters wash and blow dry our remaining chicken’s behind (she is mucky from being ill). I took a 3 hour nap. So a combo of self-care and watching my big-hearted family work together. And 3 more days off!!!
posted by gryphonlover at 7:00 PM on February 14, 2020 [6 favorites]

I didn't know I needed this, but thanks, MeFi. My wife had a kidney stone procedure this morning that went well, and she's snoring contentedly upstairs in a post-anesthesia haze, and that's just fine by me. It's not like we do anything for Valentine's Day, anyway, that's one of the reasons why we're together, but I appreciate this.
posted by mollweide at 7:00 PM on February 14, 2020 [9 favorites]

Also I have a lot of ricotta left if anyone has any suggestions.

There must be, 20 way to use ricotta...
Throw it in some food, Jude
Goes well with pasta, Jocasta
Don't act like an oaf, Soph'
Just listen to me

Roast it or fry it, Violet
Don't think it to death, Beth
Just give it a whirl, Shirl'
And set yourself free
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:04 PM on February 14, 2020 [23 favorites]

My babies made Valentines for their parents at work today (little Bronxx showing off his masterpiece). We only had 4 kids of 7 show up and one little one (poor Eris right before she lost her tummy) went home early because she got sick. I didn't puke cleaning up after her which is a small miracle since I'm a sympathetic puker.

After work I went to the dollar store to put together a basket for the raffle at our church's spaghetti dinner. All the baskets are always for the adults, so I put together a coloring basket for kids/grandkids.

Thanks for all the valentines. Mine went out today due to "life".

Happy day before cheep chocolate day. ;-)
posted by kathrynm at 7:44 PM on February 14, 2020 [3 favorites]

This has been A Week and I am ending it loving my little family so much and feeling so lucky that they are mine. Also, tonight I spontaneously went to a friend’s house and we hung out and laughed and drank wine and I haven’t done that kind of thing in way too long.

Sparky Buttons, we pass that place every time we head to my in-laws, but we have never stopped! You’ll have to let me know if it’s as kitschy as I’ve always assumed. Other nearby roadside attractions to look for: the Mars Cheese Castle, the helpfully-named Abandoned Haunted House Complex, and the ever-popular Bong Recreation Area.
posted by eirias at 8:14 PM on February 14, 2020 [2 favorites]

Surprised my partner with a special Valentine's day tour that the museum was putting on, followed by a planetarium show. The tour was kind of a bust because my partner is incredibly smart and curious about everything and did in fact already know all about dopamine, male anglerfish, and Osiris's penis, but it did remind them that the third floor of the museum exists and we need to visit it more often! The planetarium show was incredibly cheesy but they loved it. They had known we were going on a date all week, but didn't know where, and they specifically told me they had planned all week to wear their constellation socks on our date because it's their favorite pair of socks. Imagine their delight at how appropriate that turned out to be!
posted by brook horse at 9:14 PM on February 14, 2020 [6 favorites]

I was happy when Chad (we named him after the Pete Davidson character) arrived at Jessamyn's. I warned her to beware of Chad's wily charms. (I was dressed that way too today, by pure coincidence.)

Jessamyn soon texted me a picture of a tub stopper Chad had fished out, which had been wedged somewhere in the pipes for decades, and which also carried some gross silted decades-old gunk. GNARLY AND COOL

Now THAT says to me way more than Hallmark Visions of Valentine's Day.
posted by not_on_display at 9:25 PM on February 14, 2020 [3 favorites]

It's nice being an old, married couple. We exchanged little gifts last night, and tonight we watched Kinky Boots, after eating take and bake Indian food (thanks, Trader Joe's), so we didn't have to go out.

We had a nice potluck at work, where we also had a gift exchange. We were all in food comas. It was a nice day.

Also, a reminder that chocolate is going to be super cheap and on sale tomorrow.

Way ahead of you. Still eating Christmas candy :)

Hugs and happiness to all y'all!
posted by filthy light thief at 9:26 PM on February 14, 2020 [4 favorites]

I’ve had historically poor Valentine’s Days, and usually they’re not so great to the interminably single like me. They’re something to get through, until all the constant reminders pass on how you are unable or unworthy of finding that thing that everyone else seems to be able to.

Work today was craptastic. After, I went for my annual solo Valentine dinner of Chinese at a dodgy restaurant. Also craptastic.

Then I went to the local indie theatre. It was showing Before Sunrise. I was rejuvenated by Art. I was made happy by others finding love, instead of being focused on my own travails.

Best Valentine’s Day in years.
posted by Capt. Renault at 9:50 PM on February 14, 2020 [15 favorites]

This morning my mother group-texted, “Happy Valentine’s Day, I hope you are all still alive!” Which seemed like a low bar for happy, until I learned my brother’s family has some gruesome stomach bug and they’ve all been dramatically texting my parents. I’m very much in a LOVE IS DUMB AND ALSO A TRAP space at the moment, but my enthusiastic five-year-old is not. I made us heart-shaped quesadillas and delicious sides for dinner, we went through her valentines from classmates and practiced spelling their names, and now she’s snoring heartily in a pile of blankets with the cat. I have what might be a date next week, which is probably dumb and also a trap, but I’m trying to maintain a sense of curiosity. My spring bulbs are coming up, it smells like growing things outside, and I am in fact still alive.
posted by centrifugal at 10:10 PM on February 14, 2020 [13 favorites]

In Finland Feb. 14th is Friends’ Day, so friends send each other cards or other messages talking about how important they are to them. My Finnish wife therefore spent a lot of yesterday receiving and sending messages from friends (and I should say that my oldest Finnish friend sent me a long letter too which I replied too) and had a couple of friends over for dinner who were visiting Iceland from Finland, which was lovely.

But I lived long enough in the US to have it ingrained in me to do something romantic on Valentine’s Day. But this year there was a heavy storm that battered Iceland, so it wasn’t wise to go out of the house until late in the afternoon, but I used the opportunity when putting our seven-month daughter to sleep in a pram to get seven roses (for the number of Valentine’s Days we’ve been together) from the flower shop. It was still pretty windy so the flowers had to be wrapped extra much, but they made it home in one piece.

This is our seventh Valentine’s Day together and my wife is always surprised that I get her flowers or do anything else.
posted by Kattullus at 1:43 AM on February 15, 2020 [23 favorites]

I ordered flowers for my wife yesterday and they took all day to arrive, not until 7ish in the evening which was annoying but I also understand how busy florists and delivery people are on a day like yesterday, so trying to be grown up about it.

Wife bought me a bluray copy of Kurosawa's Dreams, which we watched last night, and I bought her a matcha tea set. Today is our day of doing something cliché and we're going to a winery for a tour and tasting.

It's been a weekend of little adventures and small surprises. I've never been big on Valentine's because for the longest time I never had someone to share that with. It's been nice having someone who loves me as much I love them. We both know how lucky and rare that is.

Thanks for letting me share a bit of our sappy love here.
posted by Fizz at 4:39 AM on February 15, 2020 [14 favorites]

I bought my husband some black garlic for Valentine's Day and his face absolutely LIT UP. I married the right man.
posted by huimangm at 5:39 AM on February 15, 2020 [14 favorites]

I took the day off as it was a PA day for the teachers. I took my husband and the kids out for lunch. I started to feel really ill though so went to bed at 4pm and got up this morning at 7am.

I feel better so I think I was just exhausted and run down. At this point in life though NOTHING says loving like my husband doing all the kid wrangling so that I could sleep.
posted by biggreenplant at 5:48 AM on February 15, 2020 [7 favorites]

Last week was my "first anniversary" with the very lovely person I am dating, we both have this Monday off for President's Day, and I have maxed out the time off I'm allowed to accrue, so we both took off yesterday and are spending the weekend in DC. He's come down with a bad cold so we are having a relatively low key weekend in DC where we aim to do One Awesome Thing and spend the rest of the time vegetating. I anticipate that I will be sick next week, but it is OK because it's nice to have someone to do One Awesome Thing and then vegetate with, especially when they are the best. Anyways, yesterday we went to the Udvar-Hazy Center, which I had never been to before. They have a space shuttle!!!!!!!! It was fun to see him in his element. Tomorrow, we're going to go to the zoo, and he will see my in my element! I have had a string of just shitty shitty relationship times - a long, ultimately maybe emotionally abusive relationship through grad school, a lot of first dates,getting ghosted after 9 months of dating, a lot more first dates ... but now it's really wonderful to be in this place with this person. And I'm looking forward to eating a lot of fry bread today at the Smithsonian Museum of the American Indian.

Love you, Metafilter friends!
posted by ChuraChura at 6:11 AM on February 15, 2020 [21 favorites]

My Valentine's Day discovery this year is that if you like anagrams, you can also celebrate SNAIL EVENT Day.
posted by rmd1023 at 6:42 AM on February 15, 2020 [33 favorites]

My work week sucked-literally 36 hours of meetings and training so no actual work, then a big crisis after 4 yesterday. BUT I escaped eventually and made it home by 6, and spouse and I spent the next hour and a half finishing up the meal we were making for family valentines dinner, inspired by this thread

We did beef Wellington-duxelles made the night before and beef sous vide-d-and a salad with beets and feta and some roast fingerling potatoes. And a bottle of pink we’d been saving. 10 year old helped wrap and decorate the puff pastry and 13 year old made the double chocolate pudding. We have a new kitchen and it’s such a luxury to be able to cook together and destroy the kitchen and still have space to work. And the food was amazing. Now three days off and only one kid soccer game. Life is good.
posted by purenitrous at 7:06 AM on February 15, 2020 [4 favorites]

Favorite valentine's day weekends: 1978, snowed in at the beach with a houseful of people & kids. Weekend became a week. A cherished memory.

1983, snowed in at college. Tom & Feldy showed up with a case of beer on a children's sled, said "Let's go party at Sypherd!" and we did.

This year, when I ordered cookies from a local baker and shared them with my coworkers.
posted by MichelleinMD at 7:55 AM on February 15, 2020 [3 favorites]

Favorite valentine's for me was years ago. We were young and it was early years of our marriage. We rented a small acerage where my husband had his machinery shop. We were poor.

But I had cooking skills and determination so we were having lamb chops for our romantic meal; table was set with our best dishes and candles; the works. Chops are almost finished and the phone rings.

The dairy farm milking machine is broken and they call my husband to go fix it. Now, you don't kindly ask a herd of milk cows to wait till tomorrow, you know? So off he goes. I gamely try and keep meal warm and covered up in the oven. He's gone for hours.

He returns with a gift: a black kitten that followed him everywhere as he was working; and the farm was fine with him having her. She smelled like cow poo. For three days she snuggled in my lap and smelled of cow poo.

She turned into a fluffy black love who was a social chatterbox named Chatter. Best present ever. And she enjoyed the lamb because we didn't have any cat food around.

We ate sandwiches and cake. By candlelight.
posted by mightshould at 9:34 AM on February 15, 2020 [32 favorites]

I made (and ate!) creme brulee for the first time with my sweet last night after dinner and it was delightful and delicious!

We had breakfast this morning and then watched Maria Bamford's latest special snuggled up on the couch. We're off to a fondue party tonight.

I'm loving reading all your lovely stories here.
posted by Twicketface at 10:21 AM on February 15, 2020 [3 favorites]

Just remember, if you lose your bread in the cheese three times you get tied up in chains and thrown in the lake.
posted by biffa at 10:33 AM on February 15, 2020 [7 favorites]

I realized I have fully embraced my single cat lady life when I wasn't even a little jealous of all the people grabbing flowers and chocolate after work. I think I might finally be over feeling like I should want to be in a relationship. I splurged a little on dinner and then headed home to snuggle the furballs and give them new copies of their favorite toys.
posted by ktkt at 5:57 PM on February 15, 2020 [15 favorites]

I got the dogs a new squeaky toy, and them racing around playing tug before the puppy gleefully tore the squeakers out was the best background to me and my partner exchanging gifts and kind words.
posted by lepus at 8:08 PM on February 15, 2020 [6 favorites]

A friend of over 30 years dropped off a necklace and a valentine. He wasn't here when I opened it and I was flabbergasted to learn that he thinks we should get married. OMG our friendship isn't, and has never been, romantic in nature. Or so I thought. He says he has been secretly pining for me all these years. I certainly never, ever had a hint of this and I was married to other people during most of those years. Well he figured that since I am single now and he is finishing up his long career of ecological activism, that now we should be lovers and get married. Ewww...just no. I don't know what to say to him. I probably should take this to the green...
posted by a humble nudibranch at 11:44 PM on February 15, 2020 [10 favorites]

I think Valentine’s Day is bogus because I tend to think holidays generally are bogus unless they are Thanksgiving or mid summer. I spent Valentines with my dad at the nursing home where he now lives. There were balloons and decorations at the tables but the same disabled and/or demented folks in the dining room. Tonight it was clear that my dad is getting worse by the day and I could not help but weep walking back to the dining room after talking to a nurse. A kind resident I haven’t met before stopped her walker and said something like, “It’s really hard isn’t it? I’ve talked to your husband and he is really nice man.” Then she gave me a hug. She had tears in her eyes. It was super sweet and so unexpected.

Nearly every single person who works at that place is caring, and it is still a nightmarish place to have to be. Earlier today my dad said, Everybody here is just waiting to die. A lot of them have it harder than me.” Well, That’s mostly what he said. There are a lot more ellipses now in his speech. I am very happy for everybody who enjoyed the holiday and who hugged their critters or their partners or their children or all three. I’m pretty sure that old age doesn’t suck for everyone, and I’m pretty sure that some people get to have a good death. My dad had a pretty good old age but he’s going to have a sucky death and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.

But I have shown up, and I have advocated for him, and I have bribed as many people as possible with chocolate and cookies from Sweden and introduced myself and thanked people for their service. But it probably doesn’t matter. Once I’m gone, there’s nobody to remind them that my dad hates ice water and nobody to notice that he is feeling terrible at dinner because it’s so hard to breathe. Apologies for the downer! I do love this community very much. Thanks for being here.
posted by Bella Donna at 12:18 AM on February 16, 2020 [29 favorites]

Hugs to you, Bella Donna.
posted by M. at 6:38 AM on February 16, 2020 [7 favorites]

I’m so sorry, Bella Donna.
posted by eirias at 8:27 AM on February 16, 2020 [3 favorites]

Valentine's Day and my birthday are a few days apart. I handle them the same way. I ignore them. But I hope that everyone else had a great time.
posted by Splunge at 4:16 PM on February 17, 2020 [2 favorites]

mr. icing and I started dating weeks before Valentine’s Day so it seemed strained to make a big deal about it. I had also worked for many years in restaurants and bars, so I loath big event day meals.

So we got fish ‘n chips, ginger beers, and watched “My Friend Totoro”.

And now we do that every year, as we work our way through Studio Ghibli’s catalogue.
posted by lemon_icing at 3:12 AM on February 18, 2020 [5 favorites]

Hugs to Bella Donna, and anyone else who needs them.
posted by unicorn chaser at 4:35 AM on February 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

Hugs and warm thoughts to all that want them. High fives and warm thoughts to those that don’t want close contact with an internet stranger. (Who knows where I’ve been?)

And whoever needs to hear this today: you got this. You are amazing and will totally be okay.
posted by nubs at 8:20 AM on February 18, 2020 [5 favorites]