AskMe hits Gawker.com.

February 28, 2007 5:34 PM

We've been Gawkered.
posted by availablelight to MetaFilter-Related at 5:34 PM (76 comments total)

From the write-up:

"All questions of vadgeflavor aside, one thing is clear: We just fell back in love with the internet again in our mouth a little."
posted by availablelight at 5:37 PM on February 28, 2007

I don't think I can really get too worked up about another blog linking to this blog, let alone, twice. Wake me up when someone real noticed Metafilter.
posted by Dave Faris at 5:50 PM on February 28, 2007 [1 favorite]

MetaFilter is like StarKist. We don't want users with good taste; we want users who taste good. Sorry Charlie. (And extra sorry, Brendon Blatcher)
posted by wendell at 5:52 PM on February 28, 2007

So this post did in fact wendell, and in under 20 minutes!
posted by availablelight at 5:55 PM on February 28, 2007

:hangs head in shame:
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:56 PM on February 28, 2007

You can tune a piano, but you can't tunafilter.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:01 PM on February 28, 2007

"Speaking for all the guys out there who will never say this out loud: It tastes like obligation."
posted by hugsnkisses at 6:06 PM on February 28, 2007

I thought everyone agreed it was more 9v battery than anything else. Gawker makes it sound like we're still trying to decide.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 6:09 PM on February 28, 2007

If it tastes like obligation, you're not doing it right.
posted by chrismear at 6:17 PM on February 28, 2007

You missed the Fleshbot entry.
posted by mkb at 6:26 PM on February 28, 2007

from the last time this happened...
posted by quonsar at 6:26 PM on February 28, 2007

Of all the posts of all this blog THAT is the one they bring up?????


*shakes head sadly*
posted by konolia at 6:48 PM on February 28, 2007

hmmm, where is user 46,456?
posted by caddis at 6:55 PM on February 28, 2007

Blog links to other blog, film at 11.
posted by grouse at 6:58 PM on February 28, 2007

Of all the posts of all this blog THAT is the one Gawker can most relate too, obviously...
posted by wendell at 7:16 PM on February 28, 2007

If it tastes like obligation, you're not doing it right.

Exactly. If you're doing it right, it tastes like guilt and shame.

/Catholic
posted by jonmc at 7:27 PM on February 28, 2007 [6 favorites]

Okay, I've been Gawkered. how do I roll this over into honorary doctorates and a Fox pilot?
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 7:58 PM on February 28, 2007

There is something very wrong about metafites getting excited about a gawker link.
posted by necessitas at 7:58 PM on February 28, 2007

Hidden camera pix.
posted by jonmc at 7:59 PM on February 28, 2007

Never having even gone to Gawker before, all that now remains to complete the circle of life is for me to compose a Myspace bulletin, take a flickr capture, and top it off by getting head while looking at those things tabbed in firefox.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 8:01 PM on February 28, 2007

You don't lick other batteries because you can't connect the + and - terminals with your tongue.
Speak for yourself.

*licks brow*
posted by dg at 8:06 PM on February 28, 2007

You don't lick other batteries because you can't connect the + and - terminals with your tongue.

I'll answer that as soon as I'm out from under the hood of my car.
posted by jonmc at 8:13 PM on February 28, 2007

Maybe the the Morphine song should instead have gone:

"I can tell you tase like the sky, 'cause you look like pussy."
posted by shmegegge at 8:42 PM on February 28, 2007

If anything, we should be insulted. I read Gawker every day, and it takes them 3 months to spotlight one of our greatest achievements?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:53 PM on February 28, 2007 [1 favorite]

well that was gawkward
posted by grobstein at 9:07 PM on February 28, 2007 [1 favorite]

Is it too late to say "peach yogurt"?
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 9:42 PM on February 28, 2007

we have a longstanding connection to Gawker (a bunch of them, in fact)
posted by amberglow at 10:18 PM on February 28, 2007

I'd say. Choire has a real longstanding connection. Denton too. hubba hubba.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 10:24 PM on February 28, 2007

And thank you, Gawker readers, for giving that thread the snarking that was impossible at AskMe.
"Oh my, I don't know what pussy tastes like! How shall I ever get my fingers from there to my mouth?" topped with a heaping helping of all the MeFite guys scrambling over each other to give the most creepily enthusiastic endorsment of going down on their significant others.
"I think it tastes like papaya and butterfly kisses, and is the most beautiful thing in the world! Oh, sweet, sweet vaginal nectar!"
posted by klangklangston at 11:37 PM on February 28, 2007 [20 favorites]

I'd say. Choire has a real longstanding connection. Denton too. hubba hubba.
posted by mathowie at 10:24 PM PST on February 28

does anyone else hear that in the voice of the flamboyant guy from the airplane movies?
posted by shmegegge at 11:39 PM on February 28, 2007

I heard it more as Bart Simpson, really.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:59 PM on February 28, 2007

*lolling at klangklangston*
posted by taz at 1:14 AM on March 1, 2007

What does google juice taste like?
posted by srboisvert at 5:42 AM on March 1, 2007

"What does google juice taste like?"

Warm Kool-Aid with no sugar.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:33 AM on March 1, 2007

While we're on the on the subject, can anyone tell me what my asshole tastes like? I'm thinking: Skittles.
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:19 AM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

I thought everyone agreed

You just gave me this horrible image of standing around a giant vagina with all of MetaFilter, each of us holding one of those tiny ice cream tasting spoons, screwing our lips to one side and looking upward while we think.
posted by scarabic at 8:43 AM on March 1, 2007 [10 favorites]

I'm thinking: Skittles.

There are no brown Skittles.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 8:52 AM on March 1, 2007

"Oh my, I don't know what pussy tastes like! How shall I ever get my fingers from there to my mouth?"

You're overlooking the fact that the difficulty to describe, not obtain, the taste is what motivated the post oringinally, which explains in part some of the more coy "my bf sez" replies, I think. However, I found that most self-avowed cunnilingos experienced that same cognitive/evaluative blocks as I did in analyzing the flavor: it's too arousing to concentrate on.

Of course, growing a handy beard can help you store that thought for later reconsideration. Much, much later.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:11 AM on March 1, 2007

There are no brown Skittles.

They're brown when they come out. You have to dig for them, but don't get fooled by the peanuts.
posted by yeti at 9:13 AM on March 1, 2007

-Vagina: Tastes like chicken. Chicken marinated in the mense of fallen angels, God's salty tears, and vinegar.

-Google Juice: Tastes like victory. Victory lightly fermented, then dumped in a garbage can with all the booze and fruit juice you can scrounge up from your parents' liquor cabinet.

-Astro Zombie's Asshole: Tastes like undead stardust sprinkled on a sardine donut.

MetaFilter: Vagina, Google Juice, Astro Zombie's Asshole
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 9:21 AM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

Say you love me or I'll drown this ferret.
posted by Dizzy at 10:14 AM on March 1, 2007

Dizzy's love tastes like drowned ferret.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:17 AM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

I'm running the bathtub, Flo!
posted by Dizzy at 10:20 AM on March 1, 2007

I love the smelltaste of napalm in the morning.
posted by wendell at 10:40 AM on March 1, 2007

"You're overlooking the fact that the difficulty to describe, not obtain, the taste is what motivated the post oringinally, which explains in part some of the more coy "my bf sez" replies, I think. However, I found that most self-avowed cunnilingos experienced that same cognitive/evaluative blocks as I did in analyzing the flavor: it's too arousing to concentrate on."

What do apples taste like? They taste like apples. (How do you like etc.) It was titillating chatfilter swept away by neo-bodice ripper backwash from men swaining senstively about their oral prowess on the internet, of which there is no particular shortage. The only practical application of the question is some sort of gustatory thesaurus for the Penthouse Variations columns and masturbatory material for squinters and sweaters.
posted by klangklangston at 10:43 AM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

The only practical application of the question is some sort of gustatory thesaurus for the Penthouse Variations columns and masturbatory material for squinters and sweaters.

And erotic MetaFilter fanfic.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:49 AM on March 1, 2007

I thought I covered that with the "squinters and sweaters."
posted by klangklangston at 11:07 AM on March 1, 2007

True. But it seemed like a relevant sub-genre.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:13 AM on March 1, 2007

men swaining senstively about their oral prowess on the internet

"I Went Down on the Internet, And Now It Won't Leave Me Alone!"
posted by languagehat at 11:39 AM on March 1, 2007

... men swaining senstively about their oral prowess on the internet, of which there is no particular shortage.

He's right - there's more than enough internet to go around.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 11:48 AM on March 1, 2007

I am scared.
posted by lazaruslong at 1:31 PM on March 1, 2007

I am scared scarred.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 1:41 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

Shorter klangklangston: "People enthusing about cunnilingus should be mocked."
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 2:37 PM on March 1, 2007

Ineed, a rousing tongue-lashing seems in order whenever the subject is raised.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:41 PM on March 1, 2007

"It tastes like the color red.

It tastes like animals fucking somewhere in the woods under a full moon.

It tastes like want and desire poured over warm skin, something rough, something soft, something salty.

and of course if you're in love, it tastes like a secret door that is open, where everything that is good in the world is hidden."

That doesn't deserve to be mocked? IT TASTES LIKE ANIMALS FUCKING UNDER A FULL MOON? (Seriously, you've tasted animals fucking under a full moon and aren't just tossing off beret-ed bullshit? You're going around licking secret doors?)

Shorter EB: Don't mock bullshit I sympathize with.
posted by klangklangston at 2:51 PM on March 1, 2007 [3 favorites]

You know, I thought that was a brilliant parody of some of the answers in that thread until I realized it was a copy of one of the answers in the thread.
posted by grouse at 3:04 PM on March 1, 2007

One of the "best" answers, no less.
posted by klangklangston at 3:20 PM on March 1, 2007

Oh, hush now, spoilsport! It was perfectly florid purple prose. Have you no appreciation for the classics? Cartland? Steele? Libby? O'Reilly?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:26 PM on March 1, 2007

bleh
posted by nj_subgenius at 4:25 PM on March 1, 2007

Klang: It was a best answer, as long as I was best-answerin', for zealous theatrics apropos to the clitsucking at hand. It's not yardwork, it's orgasms. Most people have high praise and a sensual regard for the experience.

"Pussy," your apparent preferred gustatory descriptor for the same, is a non-answer, as evidenced by the use of the word "like" in the question.

But anyway, harumph, get off the lawn unless you're down to mow it and all that.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 5:19 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]

something rough, something soft, something salty

Wet beef jerky.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 6:03 PM on March 1, 2007

Ineed, a rousing tongue-lashing seems in order whenever the subject is raised.

Prepare the tongue lasher (very nsfw)
posted by Tenuki at 9:14 PM on March 1, 2007

Seriously, you've tasted animals fucking under a full moon?

It was college, I was experimenting.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:51 AM on March 2, 2007

So when you favorited your own answer, was that a little late-for-class masturbation?
posted by dreamsign at 4:36 AM on March 2, 2007

I cannot wait to see what happens when someone has the guts to post the "what does ass taste like" question for real.
posted by fourcheesemac at 4:38 AM on March 2, 2007

So when you favorited your own answer, was that a little late-for-class masturbation?

I find it easier to keep track of particular comments by favoriting.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:17 AM on March 2, 2007

This is my favorite thread ever, ever.
posted by Divine_Wino at 1:12 PM on March 2, 2007

"It was a best answer, as long as I was best-answerin', for zealous theatrics apropos to the clitsucking at hand."

Because you didn't actually want an answer to the question, but rather to engage in theatrics about how great eating pussy is. You got what you wanted, and the answers were the sort of hilariously bad prose usual seen when John Irving describes sex. That level of petty provocation usually goes out about the same time people stop smoking clove cigarettes and buying Ani DiFranco albums.

And yes, I call it "pussy," because I find that an emphasis on synonym-slinging is only called for when the goal is to be cutesy or when trying to avoid redundancy on second and subsequent references when writing.
But I haven't been empowered by the monologues to strum a ukelele as you have, obviously.
posted by klangklangston at 1:31 PM on March 2, 2007

What a bizarre response klang.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:24 PM on March 2, 2007

I wanted taste descriptions. A la "lavender and bacon." I don't know what your fucking problem is.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 2:24 PM on March 2, 2007

He's more of a dog person.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:27 PM on March 2, 2007

To clarify the "What a bizarre response" statement:

You use the example of "What do apples taste like? They taste like apples" as showoing how silly the question is, but there are different types of apples that taste different. When asked to describe how a Granny Smith tastes compared to a Pink Lady, you don't say it tastes like apples, you get more specific; is it tarter, sweeter, what?

mmmm, apples.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:51 PM on March 2, 2007

"When asked to describe how a Granny Smith tastes compared to a Pink Lady, you don't say it tastes like apples, you get more specific; is it tarter, sweeter, what?"

But that's not what the question asked, and that's not what you answered.

And yeah, more of a dog person.
posted by klangklangston at 3:01 PM on March 2, 2007

Well, no, not literally. Just a rough example to try and example how two different people (you and me) came to see the same question in different ways.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:41 PM on March 2, 2007

Granny Smith and Pink Lady, huh? Why would you pick those particular strains?
posted by contraption at 8:13 PM on March 2, 2007

Which apple is fucking in the woods under a full moon again? I'm making a fruit salad.
posted by dreamsign at 11:41 PM on March 2, 2007